My point of no return is the first forward movement.

Webster’s Dictionary defines Adventure as,
ad·ven·ture
n.
1.
a : an undertaking usually involving danger and unknown risks
b : the encountering of risks
c: an exciting or remarkable experience
d: participation in hazardous or exciting experiences

“An exciting or remarkable experience”, I very much like this, it is what life should be on a daily basis. At the end of each day there is always something that I can wrap my head around and embrace as “an exciting or remarkable experience”. 

For me, remarkable experiences begin when I watch the morning skies bring the light  that chases away nights eternal darkness. I sometimes pick a fading star and watch it until the morning light pulls the chain and turns it off for the day. There is a remarkable feeling in just sitting and feeling all that is around you hearing everything, while other times hearing nothing. There are times that I feel that time stops if just for the briefest moment to allow me to absorb that the moment I just lived will never be again. I know that sounds like a Hallmark card in a way, but the truth is, it is the truth.  

I have watched many sunrises and sunsets from airplane windows that start on one side of the world and end or begin, on the other side. Adventures are not always about traveling to an exotic place, that’s the journey and within every journey lays the chance of an remarkable adventure. A remarkable experience could and has for me been a conversation where words become beacons pointing to another path, another adventure.  

An adventure is turning from the highway onto some unknown road with no known destination, just a deep wanderlust to see what is there and willingness to turn, to turn the wheel a different direction. 

I have driven roads that beg to be escaped. They talk to me through the tires and their vibrations, enticing me to find other paths. Roads that draw me down them to their end or their beginning, which ever it is, depends on what I am looking for at that moment in time, the beginning or the end. Either way it is another path, another journey and is always another adventure.  

Years have gone by since I drove past a narrow westerly rutted trail in the desert that connected itself to the highway by hungry roots from tattered scrub brush and sage that clung tightly to the small cracks in the pavement barely surviving every wind blown moment from the cars and trucks that passed pushing hurricane force winds across them, ever trying to rip them from the dried cracked ground. Having no schedule to keep and nowhere in particular to be, I felt the truck slowing and the wheels turning the truck around to investigate. 

The sun was deep in the afternoon and the dirt trail glittered in different colors forever in front of me as the wind blew and the sun played off of the mica. Pulling just off the highway onto the trail I climbed out of my truck and felt the firmness of the ground under my feet. I stared off to the west shielding my eyes from the sun to envision in my mind where this rutted trail may lead. I felt the gentle breeze at my back that moved the sands ever so slightly but just enough that the landscape in front of me seemed to be ever changing. 

Kneeling down to look at the trail I began to hear the wind blowing through the scrub and sage calling me to explore its offering of a journey and adventure. Walking down the road I mentally checked my stores, fuel, food and water. I looked for tire tracks in the dirt and there were none there were no impressions in the soil at all. All of this telling me that this road had not seen any visitors in a very very long time. Turning back to the truck, I found myself debating if I wanted to take time to explore this road and its offerings or just get back on the highway and leave it for some other time or when my travels brought me this way again. 

Leaning on the hood of the truck I opened a bottle of water and looked down the highway that I had traveled for years on end and this lonesome deserted dirt track that I had never seen or maybe it was not noticed in all of my travels through this part of the country. I smiled thinking about an old song or poem about the fork in the road. Capping the bottle of water I climbed back into the truck, made a quick phone call and crossed the fence line threshold. 

I am a firm believer in the “point of no return” and for me that is when I make the first movement forward. I have never believed that there is some arbitrary point in the future that once you get there you can make the decision to turn around for whatever reason. Very few things disappoint me more than having to go back the way I came. 

With the truck at little more than an idle and watching in the rear view mirrors as the dust rose from the trail I noticed that the breeze had completely stopped. Chalking this up to the wind knowing it had done its job to lure me into another adventure I figured it was going to take a bit of a rest. 

Traveling west is always fun in the afternoon; I seem to always be racing the sun for a better vantage point where the sun seemingly always wins as I have to find that proper spot for the visor, the brim on the hat in the right position and the sunglasses ready to move up and down to see everything in the path. I was about 25 miles into this journey and little had changed in the scenery flat baked ground interrupted only by desert scrub and rocks that had been exposed to the wonders of time in the desert. Most were blackened by desert varnish giving the area the look of desolation unmatched anywhere on this big spinning ball. 

The hills directly in front of me were no longer the high hills they were miles ago. They were now, as expected ragged volcanic reminders of the violence that is ever living under our feet of the molten core and plates that are ever changing pushing the earth up here and sinking it there.    

I stopped to stretch and have a closer look around. I wondered how old this trail was and about the people that had traveled it before me. Was it a destination trail leading them to some known place or was it like so many trails that had been cut into the desert, a path leading only in a chosen direction with a knowing that somewhere, there would be something. Was it a trail of design or chance? 

Completely absorbed in the ruggedness in front of me my excitement grew wondering about where this trail would lead once it hit the mountains. Did it end, did it turn north or south to find an easier route or were the designers of my journey those that made a path not of convenience but of adventure? Did they blaze a trail over the mountains knowing that sometimes the most direct route is the hardest to accomplish and for many it is where their journeys end they just give up.

The lizard standing on a rock meters away kept a very close eye on me as he did his lizard pushups trying to convince me he was much bigger than life. I wondered if he had ever seen a person before. We were both so engrossed in each others activities that we missed the hawk that dived from the sky and plucked him off in less than a blink of an eye, neither one of us saw that coming and for the briefest second I felt sorry for the little guy. The Hawk circled a couple of times and as we made eye contact I felt like he was thanking me. Then he was gone as if he had never been there and the desert was silent again. My heart, I realized was pounding in my chest from witnessing and being a part of this cycle. it was, an remarkable experience a true adventure.

Continuing west I came to the base of the mountains and as I had expected but not necessarily looking forward to I had choices, there were two roads. One went north and the other path did just what I was hoping for, it went straight into a cut in the mountain and looked to go nowhere but up and over. I walked the road for a short distance and knew that this was the path I was meant to take. The sun was moving behind the mountains and I decided that this would be the next starting point, tomorrow.  

The morning came in silence, the same sun that had tempted me down this trail yesterday was now lighting my way forward. I cleaned up my camp spot checking to make sure that aside from tracks, I left nothing to show that I was there if only for a second in the mountains time. 

The suns light was showing me the trail with its brilliant glow almost pushing me to move forward. I locked in the hubs of my truck grabbed more water and began to climb. And as with many adventures the first few feet is easy, baiting me with assurance that this might be nothing more than a slow trip. Remember my point of no return is the first forward movement. 

Quickly shifting the transfer case into 4-lo the truck grabbed for some sort of hold on the loose rock underlayment sometimes braking the surface and sinking slightly into the ageless decay of the mountain side. With little forward movement I caught a glimpse of myself in the drivers’ side mirror and the look of total bliss on my face. I knew instantly that I had chosen the right path, no matter how difficult or dangerous it could prove to be it was without question my moment, my path and my adventure.  

Little happened moving upward after that fantastic moment of seeing my reflection and realizing that this was truly a remarkable and exciting adventure. Well very little except for sliding backwards and slightly sideways a few dozen meters back down the mountain on the broken and loose rock. My unplanned retreat ended as quickly as it began as the mountain had so kindly put a rather large boulder in my new path to stop my descent. Funny how even in everyday life there are many times, little things that help you if you find yourself on the wrong path slipping backwards and sometime sideways. 

Recovering from the adrenalin dump and wondering how much sheet metal was going to be left behind I sat and watched as tons of small rock and sheets of splintered bedrock slid down the slope. When the movement of nature was over the truck sensed that it was time to lessen our opportunities for a catastrophic fail and found its hold on the now cleared trail. And we began to continue our adventure.  

Cresting the peak 30 minutes later, I parked pried myself from the seat and the death grip I had on the steering wheel, almost fell out of the truck and looked back at the path navigated, if you can call the last part navigated. Hell it was mostly determination, flying rocks, dust clouds and no intention of turning around. To always move forward. 

I walked around the truck inspecting the damage which was minimal a few swats of the three pound sledge to keep the fender off the tire and now that I was on somewhat flat ground taking the time to change a tire that looked like a weed eater with a steel blade had visited. A little this and that and I would be on my way. 

Completing the repairs I relaxed took a deep breath basked in the excitement of the accent when I suddenly felt like the world stopped. Turning slowly I took in more than my mind could process. I was at the absolute pinnacle there was nothing above me except a more brilliant blue colored sky than I think that I can ever remember. Around me I could see what felt like into eternity. I found the closest boulder and sat for what seemed to be hours just taking in everything I could see and feel around me. I only came back to the moment when I noticed that there were no longer shadows for my mind to follow as they moved around the rocks. Looking up I saw the noon sun showing me that the adventure was not over. I still had the descent in front of me.

The other side of the mountain was a stark contrast of what was behind me. Looking out across the Valley floor below me, way below me there was green everywhere. Irrigation sprayers were rhythmically blasting water out over the fields of hay creating hundreds of small radiant rainbows that moved quickly to stay alive in the moving spray heads water as they gave life to what once had to be parched dead ground. 

From my vantage point I was able to see both where I had been and where I was going. Able to just barely see the little dots of desolate desert scrub behind me that I remembered so vividly that with the breeze talked me into moving forward across the fence line to right here right now. Looking ahead of me there is nothing I see except the beautiful green fields of life everywhere cut into an unforgiving desert with this mountain being the guardian of both worlds.

Knowing that the trail off the summit promised to be similar to the trail up I prepared myself for the slippery slope ahead walking to the edge I tried to pick a line that might offer the safest descent. Looking downward I caught movement in the sky just off to my left. Focusing I could see a hawk riding the thermals and every now and then he glanced my direction and we made for just the briefest moment eye contact. I have no way of knowing if this is my new buddy from yesterday that is just hanging around in hopes of an easier meal or if this another Hawk just checking things out. 

Either way while watching him ride random thermals being taken up then slowly descending with no effort on his part I understood how futile it is for me to be standing on the edge of this summit trying to pick a path. There is only so much I can do the rest is up to the unpredictability of the moment.  “It is what it is” I heard myself saying to the Hawk and with that acceptance of the moment I turned to head back to the truck. 

I can’t call what I did on the first part of the descent driving. It was more in the line of a uncontrolled directional slide that I swear may have included some air time and yes there was a few moments on two wheels, it is nothing I am proud of but it is what it is.  There were times that I thought or believed that I had or was in some sort of control, It was a fleeting reassuring feeling if nothing else was designed I think, to keep me behind the wheel of the truck and not just steeping out and walking down. But then what? I would be there and the truck would be well somewhere up there. It did not matter; those fleeting moments of having control got me to where the tires held firm and the journey became an enjoyable almost relaxing slow boulder crawling descent to the flat land below. 

The trail led me through the hay fields. The hay was just high enough that I could reach out of the window and feel its life touching my hand as I drove slowly by. I was met at the other side of the fields by the Rancher that worked the land. He was leaning against the hood of his old flat fender jeep with a cup of coffee in one hand as I approached he held up his hand bidding me to stop. I expected that I would have to explain why I was driving through his field but instead he offered me a cup of coffee. 

Climbing out of the truck I accepted his offer and as he poured me a cup from a thermos, smiling he let me know that he had watched me from when he had noticed me on the summit to coming down the side of the mountain. He admitted that he had thought I was not going to make it a few times as he watched me slide the first third of the way down. He felt relief when he could tell I was on solid ground. He said that it had been a long time since he had that much excitement. We talked for awhile longer about nothing in particular and he gave directions to the highway turns out, I wasn’t just over the summit, hell I was in another State. 

Shaking hands and thanking him for the coffee and conversation I climbed into the truck to start another adventure. Driving slowly away he held up his hand and asked the one question I never expected. I was expecting something like “why” and I would answer him like I had others that had asked the same with the oldest line in the world where I would shrug my shoulders and say questionable “because it was there?” No he asked me “What’s on the other side of that mountain by the way” without missing a beat I told him, I couldn’t remember and asked him to let me know when he got there. He smiled nodded his head and looked at the mountain in a way that made me believe that someday I just might get a call. 

Kevin Hoagland

Always remember, “Many great adventures began where the compass fails and the only path is the one you choose to take!” KH 

Be well and I hope to see you, out there.